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Video: President Bush Lays Out Plans For The War On Zombies - Alberto Gonzales Hires Cannibals

September 14th, 2007 | by Ginnie | (Visited 7,348 times)

It’s been a long held belief by many that President Bush may not really know what he’s doing. Fighting wars justified by 9/11, but in the end quite unrelated to the actual causes of 9/11 (like the fact that many hijackers were Saudi Arabian, which is our ‘ally’, while we’re in Iraq for some reason…), has just been one of the many.

But an intrepid reporter, went up front and personal with the President to ask him more specifically about his War on Zombies.

A few great quotes:

Reporter: You’re asking for a $50,000,000 emergency defense supplemental to protect America from zombies..

Bush: I believe this is the great challenge of the beginning of the 21st century..

Reporter: Zombies… who eat brains..

Bush: That’s what they do, that’s what they’ve said they want to do.. they have objectives.

Reporter: With all due respect, are you sure this isn’t a movie you saw?

Bush: It’s a danger to the American people, it’s a danger to your children.

Reporter: You say they’re eating our brains..

Bush: They need to eating US Beef, it’s good for em, they’ll like it!

Reporter: Zombies seem to move really really slowly, why can’t we just outrun them?

Bush: If we leave, they follow us!

For the full effect, watch the complete videos

President Bush On The War On Zombies

Alberto Gonzales On The Hiring Of Murderous Cannibals

Tags: bush, zombies, brains, white house, alberto gonzales, cheney, funny, video